How are you ?

“Hi, how are you? Fine, thank you.” … is something that you and I get to hear every day. Now that I have said this I really wish to ask you, “How are you?” It’s not a namesake; I really wish to know how you are doing. I truly wish that you are “genuinely happy.” It was never my intention to make you cry, nor to make you feel vulnerable and never ever wanted you to get hiccups. The fact is “You already are.”And all this just because I noticed, I heard and I cared?

Now before I ask “Do I deserve this?” let me ask you a simpler question, “What is it that you want?” A victory some sort, over me? Anything for you, I admit defeat. It is not a Mind Game that I am trying to win, but a friend. And to win someone like you, I can lose. I am sure you have wished that someone knew you quite well. You have always wished that someone would just understand you the way I do. You have wished that someone knew why you act the way you do, like I do. It’s not that you don’t like it, It’s just that you refuse to believe you get that from me. When there is a piece of me with in, Is it me or you that’s torn into pieces, tell me.

Tell me how many times, did you feel your heart beating faster. Tell me how many times, did you anxiously rub your hands on your thighs. Tell me how many times, did you pass by my page. Tell me how many times you got lost in those words. Tell me how many times you pinched yourself to keep away from me. Tell me how many times you wished you did and then stopped. All this, to prove that I am wrong? Or all this to prove you are not vulnerable? Is vulnerable the word or miserable your state?

I knew you wouldn’t, if you didn’t like what I wrote on your wall. I knew you wouldn’t, if I wrote. I knew I would if I didn’t write a single word. I wrote a lot, You win. Is that the Refuge you seek of me?

You are afraid. You are afraid of yourself, not me. You are afraid, you will fall … You are afraid that you will …

Know that … I am.